Chamber Film Reviews: Movie Reviews to Annoy and Infuriate 2013 (Chamber Film Reviews, #3) (ePub)

This is a collection of film reviews. A sample:

Donnie Darko - Original Cinema Cut (2001)
I used to find this film to be awkward and boring. I then saw the director's cut which I quite liked. This is the first time I've seen the original edit since I watched the director's cut. I enjoyed it a lot more than I expected. It's a solid and interesting film. It was 7 out of 10 stuff. Then the last ten minutes blew it. I really don't think the ending makes much sense, or even means anything. Why does the events of the previous ninety minutes even take place? None of it adds up and leads to him sacrificing himself for any proper reason. The ending is garbled meaningless nonsense were things happen for its own sake, and doesn't build on the plot we've been following so far. Why does the dead kid Frank start time travelling and start talking to Donnie? I don't know, and I don't think the writer-director knows either. I really don't think the ending ties it all together or adds up. I'm docking a point for the fudged ending. It's dramatically inept as it renders everything redundant that has taken place up to that point.
6 out of 10


Goldfinger (1964)
The movie was rather average. The book is very much superior to it. For all my carping about the bloat and over the top information on everything, I appreciate it a lot more now I've seen a barebones retelling. Those great big set piece sequences lose a lot when squeezed down to only a few minutes of screen time. The golf game for example is nothing in the film compared to the book. The only thing the film does better is the ending at Fort Knox, as it changes the details of what is to happen to the gold bars. The book has no horse racing in it while the movie has Goldfinger using a stables as his base in America. The film includes a line of dialogue about a bourbon drink made with branch water. This is a reference to the racing sequence in Diamonds Are Forever, which had a digression about the drink. The film was rather crudely made. I can't say I saw any particular technical merit in how it was put together. The bit that confounded me the most is why does Goldfinger give his speech about Operation Grandslam to the gangsters? He then kills them minutes later. Why waste his breath? He also allows one of the gangsters to leave (an Italian in the book, an American in the film) only have Oddjob kill him elsewhere. Also why didn't Oddjob save everyone the effort of retrieving the gold bars from the crushed car when he could have simply lifted them out of the car before it was destroyed? The whole sequence is not overly logical. Also it was curious that the book has Tilly Masterton (Masterson in the film) stay in the story up to the end while the movie kills her early on (she is the sister of the woman who is killed by being painted gold). They could have deleted her character from the film and it would have made no difference apart from saving about five minutes of screen time. It might be sacrilegious to say this, but I would like to see a modern remake of Goldfinger that sticks closely to the novel. There is a much better film to be made from this story.
6 out of 10


Charade (1963)
A very good charming movie and probably better and more fun than its obvious inspiration, North by Northwest. The only problem is I've seen it too many times and I can't enjoy it as much as I used to. For a first time viewer it's a 10 out of 10 film. It's a bit dated (crap sets, poor back projection during the romantic boat scene and weak fight sequences) but it has some style and pace to it. The humour has mostly survived intact as well.
8 out of 10