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Joshua Cody was about to receive his PhD from Columbia University when he was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer. He underwent six months of chemotherapy. The treatment failed. Expectations for survival plummeted. After consulting with several oncologists, he embarked on a risky course of high-dose chemotherapy, full body radiation, and an autologous bone marrow transplant.

In a fevered, mesmerising voice, slaloming effortlessly between references to Ezra Pound, The Rolling Stones and Beethoven, he charts the struggle: the fury, the tendancy to self-destruction, the ruthless grasping for life, for sensation - he beautiful Ariel who gives him cocaine and a blowjob in a Manhattan restaurant following his first treatment; the detailed Hungarian morphine fantasy complete with bride called Valentina while, in reality, hospital staff are pinning him to his bed. As fresh and beguiling as it is brave and revealing, Joshua Cody has created a book that gives readers a long glimpse into agorgeous, dark thrashing in the forecourt of death.

Literary, hallucinatory and at times uncomfortable reading, [sic] is ultimately a celebration of art, language music and life.