Am I Alone in Thinking...?

Sir, I find it intensely humiliating to be asked by airport security staff if I have packed my own bag. This forces one to admit, usually within earshot of others, that I no longer have a manservant to do the chore for me...''Sir, Since you reported the impending opening of a lap dancing club here in Henley-on-Thames I have organised new glasses and a blood pressure check with my doctor. I can't wait!''Sir - I believe that Barack Obama and Jonathon Ross are both 47 years old. There the similarity ends!' Readers of the Daily Telegraph will be fondly aware of the combination of wistful nostalgia, robust no-nonsense good sense and appalled outrage that characterises its Letters page, which if it did not exist would have to be invented to publish the choleric missives of all the Disgusteds of Tunbridge Wells (Air Commodore, Retd.). But what of all the letters that were just slightly too extreme, too off the wall, too politically incorrect, or just too barking mad, to make it for publication?Now the Telegraph gives their authors the stage at last: baffled, furious, frankly paranoid, and from this hilarious selection of the best we can see that every one of them is indeed Very Much Alone in what they're thinking...