Confessions of A Beta Male Orbiter (ePub)

A lust-crazed religious teenager is slowly driven to distraction by the hot babes that inhabit his evangelical, Texas youth group. Unable, due to his strict adherence to chastity, to have sex, and unable, due to his lack of financial status, to attract the top-shelf women he craves, he is forced into being the b-actor of romance awaiting a lucky break in the lottery of love. There is more than one surprise as the wheel of fate turns.

The book was intended to be a kind of manual by a one Marvin Godwin Plinkers of Lake Compromise, Texas, (an admittedly mythical city). In responding the pleas of a besieged youth counselor who cannot figure out how to deal with the beta male orbiters that come to him, Marvin decides to write a series of lectures which contain all of the suppressed truth about these lost souls. However, the book quickly becomes half-confessional, a text in which seemingly dry treatises are interspersed with true romantic confessions. The lines between genres become hopelessly tangled. Marvin refuses to agree with either left-wing propaganda or right-wing propaganda regarding romantically unsuccessful men. He himself is that lovelorn Jesus freak who, at least seemingly, could not quite make it in any area of life.

The book begins with a letter in which Marvin attempts to deal with the youth counselor who has contacted him, but the body of the book quickly degenerates into a series of dating failures and didactic mini-treatises. A recurring theme in the book is the slow loss of innocence, both theological and sexual.

The book is situated in the very-transitional time of the late 1970s and early 1908s. And because every ideological and identity politics group wants to conveniently explain-away the existence of beta-male orbiters, the book is made to be ruthless in its refusal to let anyone's narrative prevail. It's universal message is that our social bedtime stories are all false. Life cannot be controlled by them, but surges forward unwilling to ever be tamed by our belief systems. Love and sex will never be bow to human attempts to manage it.