From Under My Blanket (ePub)

Your secret was safe with many of your victims and me for many years because we never told, but I'm a bone collector bring it on. Twenty years down the road you won't even notice that I escaped and flew away. Women are starting to have a voice these days and we're showing each other how to deal with, survive, recover, and leave a narcissistic abusive person. Leave before your sanity leaves! One of those statements that are easier said.
 
No matter where I go or what line I'm standing in I hear a lot of women talking of how a man is abusing them. Some women have no one to talk to so strangers are better than not sharing what's happening to them at all. There are also many sites on the internet where women can tell their abuse stories safely, but the mental hurt never goes away. Penterest.com has several huge walls dedicated to us.
 
If a woman is opening up to you about a man abusing them please take the time to listen it could help them if only for a minute. Of course most family will turn you away even if your busted up and standing in front of them with children so don't expect a lot of help or support from family. They consider us nasty, an embarrassment, giving them a bad image or if it's your brothers they won't talk to you anymore because they feel they didn't protect you and sometimes like in my sister's and my case it's your brothers, uncles and cousins raping you.
 
Let me set this straight because not telling the entire story in my books started a family war. My two oldest brothers, a few uncles and cousins used to rape my sisters and me. My three younger brothers are angels and I love them dearly, but they don't give a damn about me because I tell everything on everyone and put shit out in the public. Oh well. One in particular was the love of my life. He's gorgeous, always takes up for me and was my hero all my life. I've only seen him at mom and my sister's funerals, but family don't talk about around him.
 
I'm not allowed around family members, oh well shit happens. Most women will agree that death is not good enough for an abusive man and we want to mess with them beyond the grave and in some situations such as claiming his death benefits it's possible. I was privileged to watch my third abusive husband, Billy dying in the hospital for over a year ridden with cancer. It was tempting to pinch the tubes or put something in them. Fourteen years of abuse with this man.
 
The first thing many women will say, "But I have children with this man" or "I have no job experience or qualifications" or "I have nothing without him" or "He will kill me if I try to leave or do anything" or "I have no where to go." Trust me that being on the streets getting raped and beaten is better than living with it daily. I have nothing good to say about living with abuse and it's hard to change a man once they start abusing you. Trust all of us abused women when we say, "Once abuse starts it only gets worse."
 
Get out however you can and run, run, run and don't stop running from him. Sometimes it starts with little stuff like putting your tooth brush in the trash or toilet or making sure your food is either poison or you don't get any. My means of dealing with abusive men are not proper, but necessary and deserved. I didn't start taking up for myself for many years. There is no excuse for a man or woman mistreating, abusing, touching in a rough manner, poisoning food, taking your money or talking down to each other.