I'm Still Here (ePub)

This author has been through the valley of the shadow of death. When I chose to use illegal drugs, I lost. I lost my whole family to drugs, except for my dad. I lost my jobs, my marriages, my children; I lost two brothers (from drug overdoses and alcohol poisoning), and my mom died of transverse myelitis all within a six-month period. I lost a nephew a few years later (from a drug overdose).

When you chose illegal drugs, you choose death--death of body and spirit. Your life will look like a battlefield with bodies of your friends and family strewn about. I lost my dignity and self-respect and nearly my own life many times. I thought the only answer to every problem was suicide. If I got arrested, I took pills to try to overdose; if I had a conflict with anyone, I tried to kill myself. Even if I had a toothache, I tried to slit my wrists. I did die once but was revived. I ran from the law, was arrested, and spent time in jail several times. I lost my apartments and became homeless.

You would think God was not with me during these dark times, but He was. I called on Him many times through prayer, and He was always there. Satan was with me also, and I felt shear evil when I saw Satan face-to-face once. But I also felt unspeakable joy when I saw Jesus Christ face-to-face. It was a hard journey to find Christ, but I read my scriptures, studied, and prayed. Remember, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:13). And know that you are a "child of God"--a child of a King--and you have royal blood running through your veins. The worth of your soul is great. Jesus Christ is your shepherd, and He goes after lost sheep and brings them back to His fold. He may not come in person to save you, but He will send someone, as he did for me. Nathan, working with the bishop of our church, was the man (my personal angel) who took me off of the streets when I was homeless. I will ever be grateful.

I believe "I'm still here" because Christ wants me to teach others what I have learned about the destruction that comes to you when you make drugs the center part of your life instead of Christ. I can tell you that the only way back from addiction to drugs is through Jesus Christ.