Lunlins - A Tale of Friendship, Fear and Flatulence / Matador (ePub)

If you like a hearty helping of humour with your fantasy adventure, then you're in for a real treat... Adults and youngsters alike will enjoy this intriguing and highly amusing tale. Have you ever wondered how 'normal' people would fare when tasked with the sorts of quests and challenges that appear in fantasy novels? How would a mere mortal overcome the stresses and anxieties of everyday life and rise to the epic challenge laid out for them? Why don't fictional characters ever go to the toilet or break wind? Why don't they ever have panic attacks in moments of intense stress or gag at foul odours? If you yearn for answers to such deep and philosophical questions, then this book is for you. When a note arrives in the village of Lunton, speaking of attacking wart-faced ogres known as the Ugbards, the peace-loving Lunlins are thrown into disarray. Gradwin and Rentuck (two useless hunters who only ever seem to catch things that are very slow or already dead) head to The Belch Inn and drown their sorrows with a pint of Garg, or six. On waking up bleary-eyed the next morning, they discover that their village was attacked while they had been sleeping off their over-indulgence in a muddy stream. With all the houses destroyed and the occupants missing, it falls to the inept pair to go in search of their friends and family, despite their hangovers and general incompetence. The tale follows Gradwin and Rentuck through the highs and lows (mostly lows) of their adventure, as well as providing some insight into their friendships, fears and, occasionally, their flatulence. The odds are stacked against them from the beginning and the chances of it ending well are remote, but I think you'll agree that their story is one well worth reading.