It's Your Funeral!

An Introduction to Your End

According to the National Funeral Directors Association, the average funeral today costs over $10,000. That s such a ridiculous amount of money that if you weren t already dead, the shock of it might kill you. It s enough to make you understand if your relatives chose to just dump your body in a field under cover of darkness. Yet, despite the expense, few people plan their funerals ahead of time. This is a disaster waiting to happen.
     What other event of such magnitude do people drop Benjamins galore on with no arrangements in place? Weddings, vacations, births of children, car purchases: most of us prepare for months, if not years, for such milestones. But none of those are sure to be a one-off. You could have any number of marriages. Dozens of vacations. Dozens of cars. Dozens of . . . children, God help you. With a funeral, you pretty much get one shot to nail it.
     But this defining moment of your existence (or nonexistence, as it were), the one chance for your friends and family to come together and remember who you were, what they loved about you, and how you left your mark on the world, is an afterthought. No, worse it s an anti-thought, something many people avoid thinking about completely. This isn t healthy. You are going to be worm food one day, and it s time to deal with it.
     Which brings us to Nicolas Cage. Everyone loves Nicolas Cage. His films have made five billion dollars. He s got an Oscar. He named his son after Superman. Yes, he blew his fortune acquiring such esoteric items as a dinosaur skull, a pet octopus, and not one but two castles, but what s important is that in the middle of his spending spree, he realized he could not take any of it with him.
     One of Cage s many purchases was a nine-foot-tall pyramid tomb in a famous New Orleans cemetery. It s gleaming white and engraved with the Latin phrase OMNIA AB UNO (Everything from One).

Kathy Benjamin s writing has received more than 100 million hits across some of the most popular humor and trivia websites in the world, including Mental Floss, Cracked, Grunge, The Smoking Jacket, and Uproxx. Kathy is also the author of Funerals to Die For: The Craziest, Creepiest, and Most Bizarre Funeral Traditions and Practices Ever.


 

2022 Imadjinn Award Finalist

Benjamin exposes readers to death in a light, humorous, and practical way. Chicago Tribune

Kathy Benjamin puts the fun in funerals by making readers chuckle, kind of in a shoulder-nudging way that lets us know it's okay if we don't necessarily want crying beside our crypts. PostBulletin.com

This illuminating, brisk guide breathes vibrant life into a topic many would rather avoid. Publishers Weekly

Just the right touch of macabre....helpful, introspective, and fun. Library Journal

A complete, non-depressing reference to end-of-life planning that every household should have and every person should read. BookTrib

Laugh-out-loud funny. GeekMom, 5/5 stars

[A] concise but comprehensive guide with charm, wit and more than a little absurdity. It's the rare book that I'd recommend even to someone who hates the subject matter (in fact, I'd argue that's precisely who needs it the most). Jason Pargin, former executive editor of Cracked.com and author of John Dies at the End

Fact-packed and funny, It s Your Funeral! is essential reading for these changing times. Florence Isaacs, author of Do I Have to Wear Black to a Funeral?

Glib and slightly irreverent, this quirky tome is packed with useful nuggets for planning one's final send off. With breezy writing and helpful planning guides, It's Your Funeral! makes the task of funeral planning seem less daunting, and dare I say a bit of fun. Todd Harra, undertaker and author of Mortuary Confidential

Dying seems bad which is why I never really planned to do it but Kathy s hilarious and informative book proves that it doesn t have to be. I laughed, I learned and I even started coming up with basic plans for my own funeral including a funeral cake (which, Kathy s right, should be a thing). I m still not entirely sold on the *idea* of dying, but I at least feel better equipped to handle it on a logistical level. Daniel O'Brien, writer on Last Week Tonight